My female man cave is where I hoard men. You should see my Australian collection.

Lying liars lying.

"Read carefully?" Psh. Whatever. I'll read as carelessly as I want. I thought this was America!

Oh, Chad's a good one.

In other words, "We're going to remind this dumbass that you don't say this shit out loud. Super Secret Policy, BRIAN*."

The drivers who tear into our cul-de-sac are the ones with kids. I imagine it's because they're so scheduled up to their eyeballs they can't waste those extra seconds to, you know, not risk hitting someone else's kids in the cul-de-sac.

Now I don't feel so stupid. Thank you.

I just had a horrible moment in that I read the headline and thought, "SHIPPING THEM WHERE?!"

So what you're saying is that I was popular and I missed it because I was wasted.

You forgot one! 15 things you should never say to an introvert.

"Huh. Women aren't watching our shows. Let's change our logo."

I got into a fight with a woman last week who told me her tax dollars shouldn't go to my birth control because of her beliefs, and if I really wanted my pills I should go on Medicare. First I told her that my healthcare coverage is taken out of my paycheck so I'M paying for it, and second...Medicare is…

Hollywood will continue to view successful women-centric movies as an anomaly. Because Hollywood employs some of the dumbest people alive.

Our chihuahua/pug is the greatest puppy. He talks and sings and will shove his head under a blanket and flail his legs when he wants belly rubs. He barks sometimes, but let's be honest. That UPS man might be trying to kill us. We don't know.

There's a little girl in one of the houses behind us. She doesn't know the words to the song yet, so she runs around her yard yelling LET IT GO-OH-OH, LET IT GO-OH-OH over and over. She has the tune a bit, but the broken record bit is getting old fast.

I once had a thigh gap, then I hit puberty. :-\

Huh. I didn't mean to put this comment here. Thanks Kinja, I feel foolish.

There you go, kids! Stick up for yourselves! Also, get suspended for doing so. Authority figures won't see or hear any of your torment, but they'll be able to smell that punch you throw from 400 yards.

The Men We Love, Plus Some Dogs. Literal Dogs.

In Rocky Mountain National Park there have been moose sightings at Bear Lake.