I'm getting married in... shit, less than three months, and I like to think I'm quite reasonable. My take on the matter has always been that everyone else is doing me a favor. Literally nobody else on the face of the planet cares about my wedding as much as I do, and the people who show up anyway - never mind the ones…

6. If your [sic] only going to show up for food and alcohol and really have no interest other than that

why do you think the original reddit post has since been deleted?

I did the exact same thing once at The Cheesecake Factory. You should have seen the look on that god damn kid's face when I bought up all the cheesecakes in the place. The resulting Chapter 7 bankruptcy was so worth it

That is not how government works.
This is how government works.
Just rent some members of congress and then things will happen.

It wasn't Carmelo. He wouldn't even pass gas.

I've seen many raves that I thought would never end.

I've seen fire throwers and I've seen rain.

Daniel Cormier ✔ @dc_mmaFollow

"What an idiot, this mouton. Everyone know, you do not smoke a tough cyclist; you let such a cyclist marinate for ten years, grill it lightly, let it marinate again for another few years, grill it very lightly again, then let it go over in the corner for a while. When it stinks bad enough that everyone know it is…

Some of them are fairly round actually.

Stephen A Smith blames Paulina for provoking DJ

how could you leave out the time in 2009 when he did blow off John Daly's tits?

"I'd like to cancel my season tickets to the Astros."

Now that I've seen the footage, 2 games seems about right.

I ended up writing the bar because I spaced out on signing up to use a laptop (in my state at that time they only had a certain number of slots for laptops). I hadn't written a goddamn thing down by hand since high school. By the time I finished the written portion day one I was averaging about four words per blue…

Googling that to confirm its existence is probably the riskiest professional thing I have ever done.

The podcast "How Did This Get Made?" is made for those of us who love this shit. Highly recommend.

Maybe you should stop dating beverages.

Anyone know where I can buy one of those lickin' machines? No reason.