5. Bubble gum. How the fuck does a stick of bubble gum create so much odor?

Die Nationalelf and for Gresshoppene

I even dress like that.

The bigger concern here is the tight white shorts and the moose-knuckle. Sandals are the least of this guy's problems. Also, lace leggings.

When my wife and I were newly married, we tried making new recipes every night for dinner. One night she tried a chinese chicken recipe that called for 1/4 tsp of crushed red pepper. She read it as 1/4 cup of red pepper. After taking a bite, our mouths were on fire. So we scrapped dinner that night and ate Cold Stone…

All that chalk graffiti on the ground and not a single dong? Seems like such a waste.

So I'm an attorney in Las Vegas, and none of the information in this article surprises me one bit. I have experienced first-hand the cronyism that goes on in Las Vegas courts. If you're going up against a member of the "old boys club" and you're not a member yourself, good luck winning an argument.

Sometime last year, I was walking to my car, thankfully on my way FROM court and not on the way to it. I had a serious stomach issue and thought I could get away with letting out a small fart. No such luck. Completely shit myself in one of my nicer suits. Had to drive all the way home for a change of clothes before…

I hate to be that guy, but I just wanted to point out a minor error in the article. And somebody else may have already pointed it out. You say "There are fully 33 million more GenXers than GenY." It should be the other way around. There are 33 million more GenYers than GenX.

Follow-up question: when you get out of the permagrays because an author follows you, does that apply across all Gawker sites? Or just for the one sub-blog that the author followed you on? Because I'm hoping to exploit the loophole of getting followed on Jalopnik where I'm much more witty.

So, is it fair to say that the police and the administration [surprisingly] acted quickly and appropriately in this case? It may have something to do with this not being [insert football team] from [insert any major NCAA conference], so it's not a huge financial hit to the university. But still, it looks like they…

I haven't seen Ronin since it was in theaters, but the one thing I remember about it was that chase scene. Watching it now, I honestly couldn't tell for the first couple minutes who was chasing who. But I didn't care. Still awesome.

Gene Hackman is a national treasure and a SAINT!

I'll take "College Players accused of Rape" for $2,000, Alex.

I think I can speak for all Utah Jazz fans and say that Deron Williams always has been and always will be blamed for Sloan's retirement.

Dammit, you're going to make me bookmark this and come back later for the answer? Not fun Kinja.

Isn't that the whole premise of Notting Hill?

The only reason I clicked on this article was to read the arguments over whether the word "decimate" was used correctly. I wasn't disappointed!

So, uh, does anybody know the answer? One of my coworkers is curious.

He clearly stole this idea from Ariana