Dude put a ring on it. Gotta respect that.

Isn't this the kind of thing that's usually found footage after a brutal multiple homicide? Or a haunting?

@StuckBetweenStations: Wordplay!

Pau Gasol was so upset the website pulled the story that he flopped in his own living room, alone. Still waiting for the call.

She does not speak for us.

Owners in Cleveland are scrambling to put that image on a hat.

Fiddy... The food... It's in them cupboards right behind you...

I like. How it. Looked like. He looked at. The chyron. To check. The phone. Number.

The Nets didn't need it. They already have Common.

Who was that kid from A Bronx Tale that grew up to shoot a cop or something and is now in prison? He should step up for the cause.

I Can't Fight This Feeling anymore: I wish this story involved REO Speedwagon.

@Jefferson Tardship: The twins: Cash-Money and New-York-Nightclubs.

@JosephL: Amen.

I only support this notion if Tebow agrees to let us Patriots fans vote on what he writes in his eyeblack each week. (Suggested for Week 1: "TOM" "H2O".)

That's pretty goddamn glib for a guy wearing a Tommy Bahama shirt.

It's okay for Ozanion to write that; some of his best friends are street toughs and rabble-rousers.

The only Americans who would be stupid enough to turn public health care into a "football helmet"—thereby participating with renewed zeal in activities that could result in their deaths—make up the entirety of Glenn Beck's audience. Prof. Nutjob du Jour is simply looking out for his own bottom line with this strained…

I'll assume, Drew, that you're under the age of 9...otherwise, you would fucking get it. Yankees fans have been pining for this victory since 2000, [always]* [staying loyal to]** the [football? water polo? date-rape?]*** team that wouldn't have [any of their 27 World Series victories]**** without their…

That's your pansexual wife, Josh Duhamel. Deal with it. #philadelphiaphillies

"In our red and white thats a simbole of power and superiority..."