Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa...he knows three Jews? Give him back his insufferable gig. #ronantynan

That photo was supposed to have stayed between us, AJ.

Mortality is the shit.

Boomerang goes the dynamite.

@NorteXIVRaiders: "Down" to Oakland? Where the F you think Drew lives? Alaska?

Cubs fans aren't racist. They just prefer Hasbro.

I'm still waiting for the second half of this video to be uncovered—the part where Mike Cooper follows Carl Monday home, insisting to reveal more about his masturbation habits and sex-criminal potential.

What the hell's a "full" swoop? Is that how they pronounce "fell" in Philadelphia?

Quite the variety of hairstyles on the men, there.

@Kid Canada: "Kid Ignorant Dead-Horse-Beater"

That Mike Lowell is crafty: "Youk, you flail about like a hooked Madagascar Rainbowfish and get ejected; I'll step in and hit some game-winning home runs."

And all this time, I'd thought that the Miami Dolphins' color scheme was the stupidest thing about them.

Buffalo: like Canada, but with violence.

That intro kind of tips the fact that "Russia Today" is a cover for Secret Agent KGB News. Dial it down, comrades.

I CAN HAZ ANOREXIC?

"To be certain, the remarks heretofore expressed have been those of the very same boosters of sports and gaming who on occasion enjoy my transcriptions."

Such apt symbolism for the NHL's deeply misguided belief that hockey fandom has no ceiling.

Nice of Berman to pick Evan up at the airport.

Serves them right for wasting valuable drinking time on physical activity.

In an alternate universe where Manny Ramirez never left the Red Sox, that encounter ends somewhat differently. (Not being written about on a blog, for one thing.)