Manny can probably also play quarterback, right? Let's get him back to Boston!

She has experience staring blankly into a camera and saying other people's words: perhaps she is ready to be a Republican president...

Jay Mariotti: more disliked than Speed 2: Cruise Control.

I don't understand how a minor league baseball team from Canada has anything to do with an NFL team from New Jersey.

How Slocum's assertion "i needs bof of my muthafuckin body parts" did not receive the same level of attention that his Fuck Lion has enjoyed is beyond me.

"It would be pretty sweet to get an old-school Aston Martin, some of the old-school [James] Bond ones.

"...seriously, I need someone to tell me. My doctoral thesis is due in an hour."

The thing about these allegations is that an hour after the Chinese deny them, there are more allegations.

I was previously unaware of the practice of celebrating two things you like by publicly sharing your fantasies of those two things fucking each other... But I'm not one to let a trend pass me by.

I find spontaneous head trauma to be an ideal sleep aid.

Brett Favre is inspiring youngsters everywhere.

Immediately after this photo was taken, Pau Gasol flopped to the ground in a brazen attempt to draw a foul against himself.

What is it with Nebraska wrestlers and sexually-charged embarrassments?

That's what those Pollacks get for tryin' to take our jerbs.

A man called the Truth should not have to be administered more than one field sobriety or breathalyzer test per incident.

He should have threatened further stranglings—that's a proven result-getter.

"...when [Jason Bay] walks into the clubhouse today, 24 players and one very relieved manager will welcome him like schoolgirls greeting Zac Efron."

"What's your name?"

Those girls were merely paying homage to the classic extra-cranial defecation sequence from Bring It On.

As for the Sox-Yankees game...Ponson looks as sharp as he doesn't resemble Mayor McCheese.