You can "say" whatever you want, but you'll still be wrong. There's a reason mental health professionals rely on diagnostic data and not gut feelings. You can ask one for yourself, should you see a mental health professional.

(Please do.)

Go out for ice cream?
See a movie?
Go to a game?
Post shrill, histrionic false hypotheticals on Jezebel?

Yes, let's stereotype a bunch of people none of us have met. That's rational.

Ideally, Clover would be shaking her by the lapels and screaming, "What the fuck is wrong with you??"

He's apparently featured in some "Sexiest Guy" contest right now, and I don't get it. He looks like a Moon Pie.

"I've never actually been invited to one, but I keep a stack of tracts handy to give out, just in case."

Well, I hope you know now that you were horribly inappropriate and rapey. Tara Babcock will be in shortly to condescend to you.

Okay, now you're just being deliberately obtuse.

I absolutely guarantee you that name was chosen deliberately to provide opportunities to give humorless responses to jokes about the name.

Excellent, even-handed, thought-provoking piece, Erin.

My interview process would probably have focused more on the aspect of Teen Mom being a garbage show about garbage people for a garbage audience, and how Dia Sokol Savage is also a garbage person for helping to perpetuate it.

Every time I see her smug, chinny face, it's a Madeline Khan "Flames" moment for me.

No, that's Chloe's natural pallor.

"Sure, it might stop your baby from developing autism, but only because your baby will be dead."

Okay, I laughed out loud at that line. Damn you. >:(

The really interesting part for me is that they eventually stopped her, instead of hoisting her on their shoulders as the New Face of the Republican Right. Could the Tea Party be evolving into self-awareness?

Jesus Christ, Shrayber, first we agree on Chloeumlaut Sevigny, and now I find myself hanging on your every word about James Franco and nodding raptly?

Dear God, our hate sex would be glorious.

"I ARE SMART CUZ I KNOWS HOW TO LOG ON TO THE INNER NETS AND FLING POO! herpderp"

"Kendall and Kylie" are "making an app" in the same way that going to a car dealership means I'm building a car.

This is the stupidest fucking idea I've ever seen.

Many atheists will spontaneously combust if they do not bring up their atheism at least once an hour or so.