One time I was at the gym, working pretty hard. There wasn’t a lot of people there except for this really attractive blonde girl, who kept looking at me and making eye contact.

This image is the polar opposite of this one:

Never is the short answer. Never ever ever is the long answer.

Johnny Lawrence is the Karate Kid because he earned the title. Not some nerd kid.

Is he a nerd or is he a bully? Make up your mind, Stinson!

Sounds like Barney Stinson’s version of the movie.

This is a good find. Thank you for your contributions to my laughter. +1

No fucks given.

“I got taken advantage of” is generally not a viable defense to discharge child support obligations. Otherwise every dude would argue “she said she was on the pill!”

The one way I could see this being productive is if the data shows that, with the promise of confidentiality, record execs are MORE willing to say they believe Kesha. It would be interesting (and fucking tragic) to find out that people who support—or refuse to dismiss—Dr. Luke publicly are actually more certain of his…

It doesn’t sound like he was convicted of breaking any drug laws. So, how exactly does “against the law” without having been convicted of anything work?

Can I bill for all the time I spend on Jez correcting people about the law surrounding motor vehicle accident negligence

Doubtful. In order to go to jail for a causing a death while driving, you have to be driving incredibly recklessly. It is not automatic for even drunk drivers to go to jail. And the jail sentences, when imposed, are very short. And if the victim wasn’t another driver? There is a good chance you would get a minor…

Not if you weren’t driving recklessly and it was a legit accident. Those do happen

“They are still stunned that this is how it has all gone down,”

On behalf of all Texans, please let me be the first to say:

No it doesn’t that looks like absolute dog shit...It looks like someone super zoomed a pic of Vader on it It looks stretched the fuck out also, there is no universe where that looks better

I do not like this outfit. I do not like this picture. I do not like them here or there. I do not like them anywhere.

“Your sister? What?? No no no, baby. You’re the hotter one.”