I think we have evidence of that already. It was done from about 800BC through 400AD and gave us what we call the Bible.

She'll be okay. It's all downhill from here.

"But it went way too far, and it wasn't very clear that it was a joke, that it was fabricated. If you read it, you might think that it was actually Tiger talking. The whole thing is completely ridiculous."

He then went on to compare Alex Rodriguez to a cock.

I somehow knew the Astros only had $17.69 tied up in long-term deals. Altuve needs a better agent.

Grant Fish: [whistles happily all the live-long day]

Shooter Flatch: [Looks in stands, doesn't see wife in seat, figures she went to the concession, sighs in relief, begins working on story about why he missed]

One of my lifelong favorites, George Gershwin.

Neither Ray Rice nor Adrian Peterson should come back any time soon, but there's no doubt that NFL disciplinary czar Fran Tareyton is more likely to empathize with Rice.

Sent from my iPad, which, of course, was provided to me by the NCAA itself as means of swifter communication and immediate word processing, and without which I could not brainstorm the exacting, distant, and corporate-speak word salad needed to over-reach jurisdictional claim in the interest of punishing PSU…

"He's at the 45! He's at the 45! He's at the 45! He's at the 45!"

I found something interesting. I found it interesting that you think I'm going to read through all that shit and do your job for you.

The Scotch 'N Sirloin: http://www.scotchnsirloin.com/

BREAKING: The Royals won by 10 and the game was over by its midpoint.

Americans are fat because they eat too many refined carbohydrates and do no exercise. That has absolutely nothing whatsoever to do with the gluten content of their food. Gluten is a protein composite.

Wilson would not comment on the trash bags he was carrying, which appeared stuffed with J Crew catalogs and back issues of Vanity Fair.

He must feel betrayed, especially after giving Maddon those two boys.

The Icelandic judge gave him a 10 for sticking the reverse landing. Very impressive, Senor Wingdings.

Percy Harvin: making his teammates blacker, one eye at a time.

- "I don't think he's black enough."