I used to love it growing up, but haven’t paid attention in years; this year I made a big deal out of it with my kids, and they’re currently watching with rapt attention. Good race so far.

Since I have nowhere else for this hottest of takes: fuck that national anthem rendition and fuck Darius Hootie. Pitch all over the place, bizarre phrasing, terrible. The best part was when the F-18's flew over, because that meant his torturing of the anthem was over.

In fairness, he probably was/is drunk too.

TL;DR

“Finally, the great taste of Worcestershire sauce in a soft drink!”

Man, I never leave shit behind when I camp, that’s just fucking rude and douchey. Fuck people who do that.

[slow clap]

This is top-notch Kinja

Hilariously bad Kinja.

I think there’s a guy down the road from OKC who has a little bit of free time on his hands right now and just happens to know a thing or two about throwing a solid right hook...

“Fahk-you-tow-nies!”

This is some delightful Kinja right here.

He’s Barry “Melonfucker” Petchesky, not Barry “Jackfruitfucker” Petchesky...

Man, where’s the laser-guided bomb strike when you need it??

Twitter: the preferred medium of morons and assholes all around the world.

Man, Chris Bosh will always be a player

True. But in fairness, Simmons is awful (in front of a camera, anyway).

Ah yes, ye olde Ford Gloryhole.

Q: is she complaining that dude should have come after her earlier? Also, screaming aside, the way she takes that hit she makes Joey Batts look like a punk-ass-bitch.

Hot Take: Apocalypse Now is, aside from a few iconic scenes, a self-indulgent pile of coked-up, pretentious garbage.