Oh come on, if you’ve spent any time in a wind-orchestra-thingy, the answer is easy:

Well that certainly was more to-the-point than usual. Fitting, though, considering this fuckstick never really mattered anyway.

I’m more partial to Vanispheres, myself:

Now that’s some pedantry I can get behind!

She was the best of dogs, she was the worst of dogs (really, she could be really terrible when she wanted to be), but she was the first dog who was mine, and I wouldn’t change anything about how she was!

This is my (now-passed) fat Lucy the day I took her home:

This is why I pack my suitcase as one of two carry-ons and always check it at the gate - which, as of yet, is still free. OTOH, I basically fly once per year now (and have no aspirations to make it any more frequent than that).

+1 Wilhelm Scream

We have a lot of cats, and when it comes to hugging them, my desire to do so is directly proportional to their annoyance at my doing it. (I’ve also been known to nibble on their feet.) Except for our “former feral” - she’ll fuck your shit up:

Half of the Braves’ roster this year is “let’s remember some guys”. The other half is “who the fuck are these guys???”

You would think this the incredibly obvious step but, well, here we are.

It’s easy!

In fairness, ducks don’t have sphincters...

So, wait, he’s pining at length of the travails of the moderately wealthy who have to deal with the unwashed masses while enjoying symbols of conspicuous consumption? How has the NY Times style section not yet hired him???

Even as a Blackhawks fan, I love this.

Counter-counterpoint: a Venn-diagram of “former athlete who knows football” and “is a cunt” would be close to circular.

Dear God, if you sincerely believe that Nantz and Sims are “good” imma have to track you down and throat-punch you.

I personally would be happy if there were no post-game press conferences again, anywhere, ever - primarily so ESPN wouldn’t feel the need to cover them (holy shit I’d rather put out my own eyes with sporks than watch that boring-ass, pointless shit).

Holy shit, look at that, musicians who need monitors because their instruments are actually plugged in and they’re actually playing!

This all, of course, reinforces my contention relative to his ‘sex addiction’ for which he was purportedly treated.