This was Tyler Perry's best work in years.

*NOT PICTURED: Stephen Garcia shitting in the punch bowl

No big deal. Somebody just asked Dana White to verbalize the deepest thought he's ever had.

"uh... I came."

Over the past year, I've heard that Al Davis has booed the Raiders a couple times.

"None of the Die Hard movies after the first one had much reason to exist, but they were still all pretty good, save for maybe the one with Samuel L. Jackson."

Where do you think he's running? Quick, let's take a gallop poll.

"That unfaithful bitch."

You think Raymond Willie was laughing when Verne stole his lady? Ask his friends if he was chuckling when he had to file divorce papers against his beloved Brooksie?? You think he enjoyed the feud with the local Schlitz distributors???

Bill Raftery: ONIONS!

"A little thing that can turn into anything at anytime."

the old one is fine and I haven't cleaned it in two years

Steelers fans will all agree that their greatest nemesis has always been the Browns.

"Impressive."

In order to make the statue appear more lifelike they buried his head in the sand.

Translation: "YEAH JEETS YEAH JEETS YEAH JEEEEEEEEEEETS!"

And to think there were some who speculated that Ford would never run again.

"Hey, are those doughnuts? Someone brought doughnuts??? CHOCOLATE ONE IS MINE I CALL....oh crap sorry, I just wanted a...BAGEL? Dammit..."