I do know, in fact, because I recently had to switch to frozen miscellaneous calf parts for my own god offerings. I don't think they're fans (the gods, not the frozen calf parts, although the frozen calf parts probably aren't fans either).

Wait wait WAIT. A fitted sheet should have ELASTIC????

Lmao "sooooo much cat shit"

That must make their students of color feel so supported. Way to be, teachers. Thanks for making the rest of us look bad.

My dog has eaten butter and blanket. She prefers the other dog's shit to cat shit but, in her defense, we don't have a cat. She's on the goose shit though. Things she's eaten that have made us actually wonder if a dog can be crossed with a goat and she's the result:

yo same my dog broke into a closet and ate

Poor kid. First her parents make her move to Florida, now this.

Growing up we had one dog that was just crazy and did all sorts of weird shit:
-Ate loads and loads of shoes (we could never leave them out, lest they be eaten)
-Ate loads and loads of trash (we had to put the garbage can in a closet)
-Genuinely, ate my homework one time
-Ate an entire cased pork roll (including the…

My dog, Sophie, is wonderful now, but she had major issues with destruction when she was a pup. Here's a sampling of the things she ate: three laptop chargers, a strand of Christmas lights, over 200 CDs, one stair, a 1 foot square of carpet, the cable wire, an Italian sandal, the couch cushions, lotion, two television…

I once found kittens that were abandoned by their mom in a field when they were so teensy. well, apparently the momkitty is supposed to teach them to poo by licking them. We had to use a face cloth instead, until my mom's cousin was like "my dog LOVES helping litters of kittens in my barn". So she started bringing her…

Allow me to ruin a perfectly delicious old-school/office candy by telling you that my dad calls cat shit "Almond Roca."

My ex-roommate's dog used to eat socks all the time. We'd find poop-crusted socks in the yard all the time.

toddlers + pets= all the snacks. My cat sits under the table and just lets the food rain down on him. He's enormous now.

my dog ate a pound of baloney in the butcher paper in the time it took me to pee.

A former vet of mine called it Doggie Almond Roca.

I had a friend who used to say "ugh, the dog's been bobbing for tootsie rolls again" when she would see the litter box had been, erm... Pillaged. Even thinking about her saying that now is making me giggle.

When I was a child, we had two calves. When they pooped, our two dogs would eat the poop as it came out - poop on tap.

My husband had a shitzu growing up. They lived overseas for a year and left the dog with a neighbor. Come thanksgiving the dog ate the entire Thanksgiving dinner plus a box of Oreo cookies. The entire fucking thing.

I have 13lb dog and sometimes I forget how large other people's dog's shits are.

I'm now officially going to start referring to feline poop as CAT TRUFFLES.