Wasn’t her sentence extended after the fight with Pennsatucky?

Aaaaw. I’m really sorry. They are why we can’t have nice things.

As a thirsty beard lover going through a particularly nasty heartbreak right now, may I say...

Comment of the fucking year. I love Kitchenette so much.

Ohmigosh I thought you were going to be mean about her and I had to do some deep breathing for a minute.

It’s been two years since I lost my Nan, and I am 100% not okay. I moved recently and in the move I found a baby cardigan that she knitted, and I bawled my fucking eyes out. She loved to knit, but by the time I was pregnant three years ago, the Alzheimer’s had taken that from her. She never knitted anything for my…

So now jurors can’t be a felon, a victim of crime or have an opinion against the death penalty?

HE’S A BUNDLE OF LEGS. I WANT TO SNUGGLE.

Omigosh I love greyhounds. A friend has one and I live vicariously through his instagram feed. They look so big and derpy and lazy. I wanna snuggle.

Batiste dry shampoos, generally, are Da Bomb Dot Com, but I especially love the ‘Blush’ scent. It’s a very subtle scent (some of the others are a little strong for my taste) and wicks away any greasy ickiness while also giving a bit of a volume boost. I wash my hair every other day, but sometimes on weekends I’ll skip…

Batiste dry shampoos, generally, are Da Bomb Dot Com, but I especially love the ‘Blush’ scent. It’s a very subtle…

My dog has a very unfortunate way of showing people he loves and accepts them. He just puts his penis on them. Doesn’t hump. Just places his penis on your knee, foot, arm, whatever appendage is available, and looks at you like “whaddup. That’s ma DICK.”

Is.... Is that a bag of dicks??

SO JEALOUS

No. That’s it. From now on, this Brit is calling the male equivalent of a hen party a “cock party”.

I am That Brit that is totally obsessed with the royal family. I unapologetically love them and everything they do. I am uncontrollably squeeing at these photos.

“DONNA PINCIOTTI PUT SOME CLOTHES ON.”

The other morning, I woke up to her gently extending her claws into my scalp as I slept, as though to see if I was dead enough for her to safely strip the flesh from my face or to test my suitability as a scratching surface.

I love my dog and his pathetic neediness. I also love cats for their sheer lack of fucks given. At one time, I had a cat as well as the World’s Neediest Dog. Unfortunately, I had to take a trip overseas for a funeral - I was married then, so the furbabies stayed at home with the husband - and I’ll never forget the…

ALL THE STARS.