I had all but forgotten about Steven Jackson and Jamaal Tinsley until just now.

- George RR Martin will finish his books before Christian Hackenberg starts an NFL game

The Green Mile. Several different scenes, most obviously when Paul (Tom Hanks) refuses to give the order to electrocute John Coffey.

Thanks, I’m crying now. I’m such a pussy.

Step-Brothers. Yes, Step-Brothers. When Brennan rocks the house at the Fucking Catalina Wine Mixer and saves the day, and Derek flashes back to their childhood and realizes he’s always been a dick. I tear up every time. Don’t ask me why.

Is it up to the sanctioning body to choose the refs? I mean, as much as Dana White hate Yamasaki, It’s surprising to see him in the UFC octagon.

Left my old husky mix at my Grandmother’s while the GF and I went away for the weekend. My Grandmother left for a couple hours and the dog chewed a dog-sized hole through a bedroom door trying to get outside.

Yes please

I was trying to think of a clever Mike Pence tie-in as well. No way I could top yours.

My proposal: After each scoring play, put 5 seconds on the game clock and begin the countdown. Players have free rein to do whatever the fuck they want, with whomever they want, for those 5 seconds. When the time runs out, the players must stop and head to the sidelines. If not, 15-yard penalty.

This is the worst! “I’d like to take the time to thank each and every one of you who took the time to wish me a happy birthday yesterday...you’ll never know how much it means to me that you spent 4 seconds of your life thinking about me.”

One of two things probably happened:

#Hero

Haha, just did the “Dr. Strange, Magnificent Seven, Accountant” trifecta a couple weeks ago myself on a 9-hour flight.

COTD

I starred every single drug reference below.

Goddamit, you’re right. I got away with this error for 3 years, before some smartass caught me.

Fucking awesome

You from Indy? Have you seen his show yet? Pretty damn funny.

Same here. The new HC, Tom Allen, is from my hometown. So I’m not too bummed about the firing.