“Mine was worse.”

I love this joke so much.

Wait a minute. How did they get the car so close to the field?

A few weeks ago, I was in a class for work, and we had a catered in lunch. The girl sitting next to me said, “Oh, I hope they have something gluten free.” I responded with “Oh, you have Celiac disease?” To which she replied, “No, I’m just kindof intolerant. Like if I eat gluten, I get bad heartburn.”

What a waste of good tickets! I guess I just don’t understand what motivates a guy to burn like that. It might not be proper for An American to say, but if I was there I would have tried to reason with him, and if faced with resistance would have tried to forcibly take the tickets, nay, palm them.

Wow, what a shit show.

I should say here: don’t do this. But if you do do this, do like Buchanan did and plan your escape route. And if you do that, and get away scot-free, don’t talk to the local news and give your name.

The guy hit 488 career doubles and somehow people are surprised that he still knows how to find his way to second base.

Everyone clicked on this because they thought they were gonna see a nip slip

“Here’s how this year’s stadium affected the HR derby.”

I’m trying to find the part where they answered the question.

This would never have happened on team from 10 years ago. THAT Vikings squad knew all about love. And seamanship, for that matter.

via Google news, I landed on an opinion piece on USA today (I clicked the wrong link, I was crying so happily) that was like, “no, don’t worry, straight-marriage will win out, it’s not going away.” like now straight marriage is banned or something.

He’s just a Cub, Andy. He’ll fight you in a few years, when he’s ready.

god please don’t say multi-role sub. Some admiral will get a spending request boner.

Thanks for encouraging this, Miguel. I look forward to sitting next to him in about 11 years when his lungs have turned into leather and he can legally drink beer.

I’m impressed. The last time I caught something in Cleveland it required three rounds of antibiotics.

One Of These Days This Will End Poorly

Bonus GIF

With Hunter, you always have to keep both eyes on him.