Well I guess the rest of us are just going to have to pick up the slack.

Florida Republicans: “well well well, if it isn’t the consequences of my actions.”

Law enforcement continues to shit their pants any time someone does something even vaguely threatening.

I believe the officer was quoted as saying “I swear, I thought he was black!”

No shit. If the cops are that jumpy they need to be in another line of work.

Traffic stops should not receive the death penalty.  

I imagine the first cop was like, “OK, I’ll just stroll by, slap this fucker on, and move along without her noticing.” But eventually word got around the precinct and everybody decided they wanted to play The Wire, too...

“Three in the morning? In...

Nope, you put it on the local ‘grandma car’ that only goes to Walmart and church, preferably a car that is parked where yours is where you live.

I would’ve slapped it to the bottom of an Amazon delivery truck  or even better yet a semi that was from out of state. 

Isn't that technically what any gas stove is? I mean, yeah, you could start a grease fire, but plenty (read millions) of people use a gas stove every day and don't set their house on fire. 

In 1970s New Orleans, the public school cafeterias served red beans and rice pretty much every Monday, and Monday only. Don’t know if that’s still the case though. We used to have every Nov 1st off as a holiday, so Halloween was a late night out, but they apparently ended that a while back.

I made them last Monday. But we ate them Tuesday because they are better if they sit a day.

My parents are pretty well off, not 1%-er or even close, but they’re in good shape financially. Part of this was a smart move on their part to move out to a small town with low cost of living when they retired.

I think Weasel #3 (who is not named in the Getty caption for the photo) is John McEntee, Trump’s first personal assistant after the 2016 win and a true representation of turds floating to the top of the cesspool. He actually got fired for gambling debts to the level of being unable to get a security clearance, but he…

The image for this story is such a funny flashback.

I got a text message with a Trump hat in the trash from my father. A staunch Trump supporter from day one. He said I probably shouldn’t wear this in public and Trump has “now” shown that he is only out for himself no matter the cost . He was able to separate himself from the ideology. Which the family found surprising.…

I stayed up watching the raw CSPAN footage as it aired from the reconvening onward.

I’m not sure whether I would hate to be the guy to tell Rudy that Trump’s not going to pay him, or whether I would love to be the guy to tell him that.

My first exposure to him was on Seinfeld in the fat-free frozen yogurt episode. I was probably 15 or so. I probably thought he was “cool” because he was down to participate in the joke on a sitcom. Probably also couldn’t imagine that Jerry and everyone else would have him cameo on the show if he was a complete piece…