No such thing.

You definitely covered the starters, but maybe next time provide a little more info about the serbs.

As per usual. Dammit.

I'm struggling to feel sympathy for Superfan. Everyone just laughed when the counselor harshed my mallow at the campfire singalong.

Katz, 1998: I'm gonna turn this thing around myself! [has modicum of success]

Per usual, Diaw relished the opportunity to finish his teammates' dishes.

Lance Stephenson: Flagrantly face-palms on Norris Cole outlet.

Oh yes, life is good.

Oh dang. I figured this post would be about the rural Alabama tradition of hurdling as many polecats as possible in a single bound. Clear six polecats and you're man enough to work the plow.

Baseballs: [band together]

Maybe now people will take me seriously when I boast about my NFL physique.

I know it's entertaining for the kids, but it's only a matter of time before a teacher dies in faculty vs. pro athlete competition.

Carroll was tased and arrested at the post-ceremony luncheon after he tried to unmask the presidential impostor.

"Well, cannibalizing a player is actually okay as long as none of the thorax goes to waste", Boras the spider added.

Rice has already completed the first step in the diversionary program and can now wait patiently for his wife to wind the jack-in-the-box before punching her in the face.

Al Dente's Peak

Oh God I hope the Burlington Coat Factory wasn't harmed.

Do you think if you got going really, really fast, like, almost pedal-to-the-medal fast, that you could go off a small ramp and be launched into flight where you could drive around in the stratosphere and get stuck in cloud traffic and beep at eagles and such? And sit in line at the cloud bank drive-thru? Hahahahaha

I haven't been a fan of this self-important jerkface since he changed his name from Tour in an effort to attract a more cosmopolitan audience

Yeah, Foles has been scribbling his own plays in the dirt since high school.