I’m going to wait for the Arby’s LARP. It’s very similar to this one, but the setting is post-apocalypse.

Wegman’s should put a stop to this by simply making everyone shopping there wear grey until they’ve demonstrated to the staff that the only pictures they’re going to deposit on products are worksafe and whimsical. Then those shoppers will be allowed to wear more noticeable colors and promote other shoppers whose…

I’m just going to admit that I can’t tell, and I’ll leave it up to the referees on the field.  I mean, they’re the top guys in their profession; surely they wouldn’t have been hired if there were a chance they could get this wrong.

“I’m intrigued by your logo and I’d like to join your country club.” - Dan Snyder

In other news, Sandy Duncan has been seen jogging in place and stretching her neck muscles, before whispering to herself, “Let’s do this.”

That’s absurd. Nobody in their alt-right minds would ever advocate riding around on saddled homeless people.

This can only end in one possible way: Mama John has to start dating again, and they rebrand the comany as “Uncle Roger’s” pizza, the pizza that wants to cop a feel as it sloppily tucks you into bed at night.  Papa John can deliver pizza to you on alternate weekends and for three weeks in the summer.

Well, that goes without saying. You know a lot of those 3.5 billion ios and android devices on the market are just taking up space in people’s drawers, anyway.

It seems like a damn waste that it’s on a platform other than the Switch, of course.

So, which one of those guys is the manager, and why are they wearing a player’s kit?

The streaker—an Irish citizen living in Vancouver who, if you are just joining us, whipped his dick out in front of 40,515 others for $80 and a few laughs—reportedly could be deported for his indiscretion.

Because what could possibly go wrong when someone brings a weapon to an Ariana Grande concert?

I’m not sure I did this right. I tried copying Five Guys, and all I got was a decent if overpriced hamburger.

...And the retail price will be just $175.00.

“Sure, but can he hit 95 on the radar gun?” - Jeff Luhnow 

Three Cinnabons for $4.95 seems like a pretty good deal...

It’s got to be depressing for the guy traded to Toronto to know the Astros think so little of his talent that they’d willingly trade him to pick up a PR nightmare like Osuna. At least we know the only person Ken Giles will beat up over this is himself.

strange, hand-written letters over the past few weeks demanding replacements for “stale” coffee.

Columbus Crew.

It’s one of those things where McVay’s memory seems like a blessing, until you realize he spent seven years working for Dan Snyder and remembers every cursed minute.