Nobody needed to die over this, but somebody sure needed to kill over this.

My Batman would never use a gun.

How about “the suspects”?

After a quick perusal of the table of contents, I have the weirdest sensation that someone has been stalking my GOG account.

I’d advise you to lighten up, but if you were once dark blue, and now you’re aquamarine, then I guess you have already.

Huh. I wonder what the odds were that he was on Team LeBron for the All-Star Game.

Basketball 101: until they prove they can reliably make their shot, you let them have an open look all day long. Not only was this uplifting, it was sound strategy. And it was uplifting. One day, I hope we can all root this hard for Markelle Fultz when he makes his first basket.

The only silver lining for Suns fans is this injury puts him on the inside track to be picked by LeBron James as an All-Star next year.

She shouldn’t be that upset. Lots of blonde porn stars change their names several times before finding one that sticks. She’ll get there.

Didn’t the Vikings get that from Fred Smoot’s Sex Boat?

At least they didn’t do anything dumb like toss in a 22 year old who had some of the best slot corner coverage stats in the league...

I’m hoping that no other All Stars get injured before the break, if only so that not only was Love the last guy picked for a squad, he’ll be the last guy replaced.

If it’s any consolation, Colt McCoy will unseat him in training camp.

Wow, that looked like a painful injury. She ought to sue the homeowner for negligence.

The Wizards net efficiency with him on the court this season is the equivalent of the Celtics (4th-best in NBA). Without him, Washington would rank behind the Knicks (22nd in NBA). pic.twitter.com/VItidNNcH3

Wow, the only thing worse than Wall reinjuring the knees that he finally thought had been repaired last year would be if the Wizards did something silly like guarantee him another $170 million on an extension that doesn’t even kick in for another season.

“Personally, I’d have suspended him for going easy on the kid.” - Alec Baldwin

And here I figured he was going to get off because they discovered he had the right to use two handicapped spots - one because he can’t get to the line to save his life, and one because his assist rate is worse than Nick Young’s.

“Does this mean I’m not last anymore?” - Kevin Love

“Okay, I guess we’re willing to trade him to a contender now.”