Holy shit. The tears. All the tears.

I JUST WANT TO LOOK LIKE CINNA. so bad.

What they don't tell you, is that if you want the sandwich, your name automatically goes into one of those lottery balls. There will be a drawing and you'll have to fight 11 other people to the death if your name is called.

I know it's immature but I'm dying laughing right now.

I pay plenty and go to the doctor almost never. Cool story, though. Some of us just have consciences.

I understand that people react differently to death, and we have inappropriate reactions that we can't always control. I don't blame people for having an unusual reaction, but I do blame them for posting that reaction on the internet without thinking. Discussion about this is a way for them to possibly learn (though…

Please, I was 17 exactly 7 years ago and I knew how to act a f'n funeral. No explicit social cues necessary...

Right on. If I saw a relative or friend taking selfies at my family's funeral I would shove their iPhone in their nostril.

Just wanted to say I'm sorry about your dad, and I can totally understand your anger at these kids.

YES! Even if you take the ridiculous position that this is kids being kids, you have to agree that this is not apprpriate behavior...and I think she does say that at some point. How will these idiot kids realize they are being idiot kids unless someone tells them that they are being idiot kids?

This is not appropriate. Only an irredeemable asshole would consider duckface selfies at grandma's funeral "appropriate."

a) Where did I call them Satan Spawn?

Yes.

It's only understandable if they are utterly lacking in empathy for other people. Emotionally healthy people DO NOT act like this at funerals. There is a monumental difference between someone who is hysterical-laugh/crying at a funeral because they're overwhelmed with grief and some brat posing cross-eyed and saying,…

They are not the only ones who are grieving. There are other relatives and loved ones who are mourning the loss of someone they loved. Would it kill these kids to have a modicum of decency and behave like an empathic human being for about an hour? You know, show some respect for the pain other people are going…

I would only amend this to say: Get the FUCK off my lawn, stupid selfie-taking assholes.

This gets my

Oldest children around the world nod in agreement.

Jesus, Kool-Aid Man. You really need to learn how to bunt, considering you're a pitcher and all.