Okay, I admit that I masturbated to that video of taut young Aryan flesh, but I feel really really conflicted about it.

Shoot. Ignore me. Day late and a dollar short.

Depends on your definition of “toxin”. The germs seemed pretty toxic in the end.

I’m always amazed that this is how he CHOOSES to look in pictures. That at some point “dead-eyed sociopath” was a look he tried out in a mirror and decided to stick with.

Also, illegal. Fifteen’ll get you twenty.

Yeeeaahh, I figured, but I just couldn’t parse it in any way that made logical sense. WHY are they on the porch

As long as you’re sorry for Bieber, we cool.

Well, okay, it really felt like when my brain was swimming from ureaic poisoning, but I didn’t think too many people could appreciate the joke.

I need a brain shower.

What the hell is a porch honky?

???

At least you didn’t apologize for it?

An unnaturally polite child with an inexhaustible craving for french fries in gravy?

Anyone know where I can buy this peppermill?

Still not my favorite phony tv-Amish...

This is the single best movie review since the death of Joe Bob’s Drive-In Theater.

Oddly enough, this is how my date watched Jaws the other week.

The bartender wasn’t named Stifler, was he?

Apropos of nothing, isn’t it about time for a Grizzly Adams reboot?