The Miguel from Snowy River.

Excellent. That's a voice I'm comfortable hearing read a book. Nice "wife" voice, too.

Is your voice as nasally as Bill Simmons' is? I went to a reading party for him and his huge basketball book in Portland a few years back, and goodness, not a guy you want narrating an audio version.

Hovermanny doesn't work on water either.

From over in the reddit thread http://www.reddit.com/r/nfl/comments/10fkng/official_complain_about_the_refs_and_mnf_924/ comes this zoomed-in image. What a joke.

He was at the Yalta Conference

classy

I'm a biased Manchester United fan and I still think that goal is better than Rooney's. Probably the best goal I've ever seen live.

I bet James Cameron doesn't deign to touch his own penis, because he believes it would distract him from his mission of saving the world from evil space miners.

Clint Dempsey would like to have a talk with you.

I love it when Deadspin publishes these long-form guest-author pieces. Pat Jordan is a great writer.

I'm going to have to change my username if they keep this up.

Bracket names? I'll start: Ineligible Fab Melos.

Boom! +50-49.

Colbert knows how to report on Englishmen eating things.

Very good.

Well now that we know you're Canadian, my stereotypes suggest that you tell them your flannel just popped a button and you need to go sew it back on, a bear just broke into your food cellar, or your beard has reached such impressive girth that you fear it's a danger to co-workers and you need to go home to trim it…

Viewers were glued to their screens. Horses were screened into glue.

The test also showed that the "17-year-old" was nearly 30.

Please make this a recurring column, Drew. Loved it. It's a perfect topic for your rants.