Could be worse...

You hit all the tanking points except one: the talent pool in the NBA is always going to be shallower because players have to be so tall. It may be possible one day when 32 Chip Kellys coach in the NFL that every team can develop a competent (if not All-Pro) QB, but 30 NBA teams are never each going to have a star,…

I guess down here in Georgia we just live in a brodudebuddyfellapal-less wasteland.

Yeah, the "Fuck off me pussy!" move he made on Tracy Porter is what puts the original Beastquake over the top. If he had reached out and shoved Patrick Peterson to the ground I'd give more consideration to this one.

1. Merry Mothafuckin' Christmas by Eazy E

What if <insert big money free agent signing or trade acquisition here> is Elton Brand or Andrew Bynum?

Where was the Sixers' attendance when they were irrelevantly treading water with Jrue Holiday and Andre Iguodala? As far as I can recall they haven't cracked the top half of the league in attendance since Iverson was shipped out of town. They tried the other way of team-building. Elton Brand didn't work out. Andrew…

Yeah, if only everyone else was vegetarian like them. Wait, what?

You really underestimate how much white people love dogs by leaving Michael Vick off that most hated list.

No, people who have kickers in their fantasy leagues are the worst sort of people.

Man, this guy just can't stay healthy.

Nobody who likes Lil B should ever be allowed to write about music.

Confirmed by who?

So is the stock market.

There should be a series of reaction videos of people reading this article like there was for 2 Girls 1 Cup.

Pennington was pretty good when his shoulder wasn't disintegrating. I don't know if I'd put Manziel anywhere near his level.

I know this is going to come across as a severe disappointment but that 2.5% is only fruit juice. Hopefully it is the juice of some crazy Japanese uranium-filled cancer fruit.

Given his political leanings I thought Spencer Hawes was the NBA's human derecho.

I thought pantsing and depantsing were like flammable and inflammable, where they sound like opposites but are actually the same.

As an Indian I am impressed they spelled Gandhi correctly instead of writing Ghandi like 89.4% of Americans.