Yeah, she might not be completely stupid but she’s at least three-fifths stupid.

This was totally like my wedding, only we were inspired by CarTalk. Our performance artists wore vintage muscle car transmissions on their heads and in retrospect the whole thing would have been far less tragic had we not insisted that they get in the pool.

I wore Obsession for years (high school).

Yes, but George, when you ruin your children, sometimes the state has to take them away from you for their own welfare.

Yes but do you want Trump anywhere near your underwear in any form?

Russell Wilson takes a lot of flack, some of it earned, for wearing his religion on his sleeve and being a general weirdo but he walks his talk when it comes to things like this.

I just discovered this show on Netflix this week too! It’s so goddamned charming, and so well made. None of the endless filler and “my journey” tedious soliloquies you get on most American TV competitions, just lovely people, making yummy stuff, in a beautifully-produced show. The varied British accents are also a…

Prince Ali
Dangerous is he
Ali Ababa.
He must be
A terrorist
Definitely!

Here’s the thing.

Colbert is doing a WONDERFUL job and they need to put him on Hulu and stop trying to make a $7.99 CBS app happen. It's the fetch of 2015 and NOONE IS GOING TO PAY THAT monthly for CBS.

I don’t know about “The Elf” but those creepy little shelf elves have been around for awhile. I have an old ratty one from the 60s that my MIL gave me. Um, thanks, Enid.

The best thing about The Mindy Project, despite the spotty pacing and structure are the AMAZING one liners.

The top makes her look like an evil candy Dalek.

This model is bad at being a model.

Tyrese? He vaguely is an actor I guess...

You need to do what’s best for you. If you can’t deal with it right now, then tough titties for her. You can’t be her emotional support for everything.

There hasn’t been an on site transmission of HIV on a porn set on the straight porn side for over a decade. Yes, performers have contracted HIV but it has been in sexual interactions outside of shoots. My husband is a porn performer and he often works for Kink.com. How STI testing works in the industry is that…

“This will be another Showgirls”

That would be a pretty radical departure from the trailer (and a pretty dicey move for PrimeTime NBC).

My co-worker adopted a three-year-old. Whenever anyone would tell her she was a “saint” for adopting an older kid, she would look them straight in the eye and say, “She came to me potty-trained.”

“I’m just doing to hover my hand here so I don’t leave any self-tanner on your dress...”