Delivery Company UPS their Prices

Burns like a Motherfuckin’ Witch.

If there’s a hood, you open it; if there’s a button, you push it!

I work on a farm, getting muscle in my arm.

Not the brightest candle in the menorah

Not the brightest candle in the menorah

I’m sorry to burst your bubble, but the Galilean moons are not many, they are four: Io, Europa, Ganymede and Callisto.

Not quite a press photo, but still

This is why Ben Carson is the beautifullest man in government

But noone ever mistakes blood for being watermelon lemonade. Don’t ask why I know this...

That makes everything A-OK. A shower curtain would also do, but only in case of emergency!

Steal their dogs, take proper care of them and teach them to bark at your neighbours (but not at other people)

Not my mother...

Enfenestration

True dat; Instagram is better ;-)

And the one animal that can save you is Bear, Grylls

Silvery spacesuits are also accepted Corvette attire

Merkel

The human farms is where the GOP grows its morons