Most had easy solutions. Uneven crumbling cement floor? Ehh put down an area rug. And those lofts were just clever. One of my college bedrooms featured a loft made of 2x4s and I just put a chair and bookcase up there and voila! A second floor.

Is it weird that I think all of these are perfectly acceptable? Maybe I've been spending too much time on Craigslist.

It's true, our teenage girls and gay men have a lot to answer for.

Probably they're just jerks who want to freak you out.

DON'T MIND ME I'm just here to pretend that Joey, Pacey, and Jen all hung out and talked shit about stupid Dawson all night.

Generally in full agreement, but Beiber is Canadian. The U.S. washes its hands of him. We're already responsible for one of the greatest monsters of the 21st century (Bush), so I'm inordinately pleased that Beiber (2nd worst) isn't our fault.

In Peru there is a Guinea Pig Festival. They have a fashion show! Then they have a barbecue, and the cuyes are the *ahem* guests of honor.

Stop. Just stop.

Why not inform students that it's illegal to take pictures of underage, non-consenting nipples and disseminate them on the internet? That seems like the actual problem with the "incident". Not the strapless dresses. OMG duh.

Gurl, I know. I used to get ear infections all. the. time because I'm secretly a 3-year-old and I'd feel one coming on and visit the campus clinic before they closed for the weekend. 'Nope', they'd say, 'you're fine!' Buuut I just need a prescription for antibiotics just like last time and you're going to be closed on…

Seriously. I was just thinking 'It's your lucky day, EvilAbed!! You can finally get some gotdamn prescriptions even though you can't afford a doctor!' and now I'm just filled with crushing disappointment.

'05, '06, and '07 may have been, like, forever ago, but I seem to remember just about everyone being pretty materialistic back then. It was right before the recession, everyone still had jobs and shit! Of course they're gonna expect to be able to buy cars and houses.

Nooo, it knows where I sleep! Who do I make a sacrifice to to keep the Lord Kraken appeased? Liam Neeson?

Ah, the old 'mysterious leg of an animal' trick! My dog dug up an elk leg from under our porch (?!) and paraded it around like he'd found a goddamn gold mine. What was scary was trying to figure out WHAT IN THE HEYULL killed the elk, removed it's leg, and buried it under our porch stairs- which I walk up after dark…

Heh heh, I'm picturing a Dobby situation. "Misteress sylphides favorite antique broaches, oh yesss, all mine!"

It works! Those are cute! But I worry about emasculating him on top laughing at his head folds. So much potential for psychological damage :(

My dog is currently stuck in a crate after getting surgery on his little doggy ACL a few days ago. Maybe a tattoo would help him feel pretty again! Maybe some lipo too, while we're at it, because the cone keeps shoving his superfluous neck skin up onto his head and it makes him look hella fat. Like an angry little…

Totally agree. It really outraged me- 'my body my decisions' just flies right out the window as soon as you step into the gyno's office. Having access to birth control is such a basic tenet of feminism, but when you go to get some they toss the other ones, like bodily autonomy, right out.

I totally agree. At least I had a pretty strong fear of guns that kept me from pointing it anywhere besides the floor or the target, convinced it could go off at any moment, but I imagine not everyone has that.

It might be irrational, but I think it's smart. Like how the fear of heights is born out of survival instincts.