Elseif
Elseif
Elseif
Apr 7 2018
2

I work for horrible people who provide very, very little sick time (like, 3 days a year?) to those of us with salaries and just dock the pay of their hourly employees if they call out sick. Nor do they provide health insurance for any of us. (I’m there for reasons too complicated to get into but hope to be out of Read more

Jan 30 2016
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We should just send them this in reply, in addition to outing them.

Jan 13 2016
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What the fuck does “sugar tits” actually mean?

Nov 27 2015
5

Cognitive dissonance.

Jul 13 2015
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Obvs. it’s the golden top ramen. What greater sacrifice could there possibly be?

Mar 14 2015
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Look, I love proper English as much as the next Grammar Nazi, but it puts people off when one speaks properly. I do have my pet peeves, though, like anyone else with a brain. But people are challenged and call me officious for speaking in my normal voice. I can't help but feel the need to tone this shiz down. Where Read more

Jan 27 2015
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Will I be in the greys forever? I seem to remember being out before...le sigh.

Jan 17 2015
4

I saw this on Metafilter, and upon reading it, I truly understood what a "trigger warning" is. This woman could be my mother, and this is INFURIATING. If you've suffered through this kind of parenting and struggled with the decision to cut a parent out of your life, you just inherently know from her language that this Read more

Oct 4 2014
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Okay, I thought I was immune but I believe flight 93 was shot down. I don't believe in any other 911 conspiracies or any other whacko stuff. Well, except I do talk to my cat quite a lot.

Sep 28 2014
2

Booooo, Cecily Strong was better than all them all! ***Boooo***

Sep 14 2014
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Uh, didn't Martha Stewart start out as a model? Not that I am defending GOOP.

Jun 17 2014
18

How could someone film this and not pet that kitten? FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS FUZZY, PET THE DAMN KITTEN! Gah! #peopleareinsane

May 22 2014
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Wait...what nudist colony? [[[adds to map stats]]]

May 20 2014
3

All the sardines are like, "You lucky bastard! They must think the sun shines out of your ass!" Bloody whales!

May 17 2014
14

LDSD = Some sort of intergalactic, hallucinogenic Mormon to knock on your Martian door? Cool.

May 16 2014
31

When I lived in Santa Cruz, CA, there was a surfer dude who had a big bite taken out of his side by a great white. When interviewed in the hospital and asked how he felt about the whole thing, surfer dude replied: "Hey, the shark was just doing his sharky thing and I got in the way!" Indeed.

May 15 2014
3

It's like you're RIGHT HERE! ;P