James Harrison was probably waiting to fight that guy in the parking lot afterwards.

What the fuck is this shit? Sportsmanship? Genuine acts of kindness? I’m sorry, I thought this was America. /s

I mean, Panama’s entire existence is predicated on letting things through.

All I know is, if (when?) Duke gets hit with a major scandal, I’m going to have the biggest, longest-lasting boner ever.

He’ll still get fewer Heisman votes than Alabama’s 2nd string running back, but good for you kid!

Oh goody. Another year to rob a Stanford Football player of the Heisman because no one will see his games. Here we go!

That’s 564 rushing yards over the last two weeks, and not against your UC Davises and Sac States, UCLA and ASU! He was pretty incredible last week against Jim Mora’s crew, look at how many times he explodes past the line of scrimmage untouched with just a single cut.

Adding insult to injury, some little prick snatched and hid the pieces and the end of a rainbow.

Dennis Miller’s big chance came too soon.

Why are you trying to stop all the healing, Chris? If only they’d managed to win the Rose Bowl.

Fuck Texas and everyone that lives in texas

Look, in all seriousness, as a longtime Cavs fan, I can only hope Irving turns out to have been right all along. I really do. I hope that, in Boston, his dream comes true, and he falls right off the face of the Earth.

Haters. I predict at minimum, 10 of Hackenberg’s passes will result in touchdowns.

And Boston used to have him run the option which certainly didn’t help. And then San Francisco did the same where Plunkett suffered a pretty bad shoulder injury.

I never realized Plunkett was not in the Hall of Fame. That is a travesty that needs to be fixed.

THAT’S MY QUARTERBACK.

It’s amazing, with the right lighting and shadow effects, how much longer a dong can look.

Because it’s so fun to watch delicate snowflakes like you cry so much every time.