My God, all I can think of is how sore that kid's head will be from all those tight rubber bands.

You don't get it. This grudge is like a special, tarnished magic penny he gets to pull out of his pocket and spend, over and over again.

Missouri

AMEN!

I'm with you, Natty.

If these guys are a lot ballsy, we don't run in the same circles. These fellow's junk are the size of peanuts.

well, one time I was accompanying a patient to CT for an abdominal study. She'd had surgery for.. I can't remember, but there was a line of surgical staples midline. She got more and more delirious with pain, and couldn't hold still for the scan, so I held her in my arms (getting irradiated, but what the fuck, I'm…

I'm not proud of this one..but they did ask for the grossest. I've got more!

I know, I'm sorry.

One of our triage nurses came gagging back to tell the rest of us about a woman she'd admitted to the ER. The patient and her boyfriend had been having anal sex and when he withdrew, his penis was covered with worms.

I remember a Joan Rivers (?) joke about hearing a bloodcurling scream late at night in a hotel. The punchline was "Was it murder? Or was it Epilady?"

Hurray! I worked for a head case doctor that loved the gross stuff. Once we had an I and D (incision and drainage) on a massive MRSA boil in the ass crack of a meth head. Doc injected the thing with 2% lidocaine, which kills the pain, but pressurized the boil. Doc then inserted an 18 gauge needle into the center, thus…

Oh, Bwoomhilda, you're so wovely!

I'm sorry, I just have to say, I was born in '62. I still feel good, knees are a little creaky, but all in all, decent for a billion years old.

Fillers are so alien looking. Even the most subtle use seems to give a snout look. I'll keep my lines.

I love how you express yourself. Be my friend?

Kinda looks to me like someone taking Prednisone for one reason or another...Common as dirt. People swell up in the face just like this.

Punctuate, for the love of Betsy!

Oh! That reminds me..I took my sister in law to see Howard the Duck (an abomination). She was about 12 years old. During one pivotal moment in the movie, she said out loud, "If she fucks the duck, I'm out of here." Th entire audience died laughing.

I tell you what is not all that great...Gauloise. Horrible!