Brave the shitstorm that is Cracker Barrel.

Are YOU po po, too?

Zotz for life (cherry)

I went to HS with a guy named Gary Merry. He was a fun guy! At the tenth reunion I pulled a doob out of my brassiere and said, "Let's spark this." He had to tell me he was now a state trooper.

I can do impressions! I work with some true dickhead doctors and I like to assess patients "in character" right before the doc walks in. The patient is always smirking and no one has ratted me out yet.

I can French!

Say what you like about Kim Kardashian, she's a glutton for attention and whatnot, but she's not a Mean Girl.

Is that code? If so.... Yes. You strike me as the fugu fish of girlfriends. Let's do it!

did you back up your phone so you won't lose all your friend?

OK, baby, if you need me, call. But the Ed Hardy thing?... not so good.

And by the way, honey..are you OK after that balcony dangling thing? You keep on being you and don't let Joe push you around.

Yep. I LOVED Ed Wood ( and by the way, where in the hell can you even find this movie anymore?) but all the jaded, grubby pirate movies bored me shitless.

Oh, but To Die For was very good. Maybe everyone here has at least one good movie in them. Brad Pitt- Burn After Reading. SJP-Ed Wood. Goop-The Royal Tennebaums. Let's see...George Clooney, Oh Brother, Where Art Thou. Denzel Washington? I got nothing.

"Truthers have no malicious intent on hurting any genuine victims." DOUBLESPEAK! I will translate: (we get to decide whether our actions are malicious, AND if victims are genuine)

I never get sick, ever, but once I went out to the ambulance bay to find a Cadillac with a rather prissy lady driver and her elderly dad. Old Dad was sitting on towels and sheets to spare the seats. The old gent had convinced his caretaker AND his granddaughter to both buy him a bottle of senna laxatives. He took…

tittering!

Yeah, I bought a new motorcycle and I hit the man up for a free helmet and he had to dust off an XL that leaves marks on my forehead and gives me a pain. I'm a 5'2" female. The salespricks stood around snickering, but whatevah, they're a bunch of Mediums.

Wrestling practice. Singlets amplify this.

Interesting! I just met a patient that has what appears to be lividity on his arms. It is identical to that of a dying/just died person.

Mine is currently sitting in an office chair, blaming me for my poor life choices. I'll take it out for an airing soon, and maybe it'll shut up already, or at least change the subject.