Hey I wasn't brought in to answer questions, mister!

Who is your favorite character from Spongebob Squarepants?

Why does the world suck so much right now?

How big is your gun?

Of the $753.8 million made by Jell-O in the past year, $753.7 million of that was used to engulf various office supplies.

+1 chair cushion

She would've called him a "Bostonian" but figured she didn't need to be so vulgar.

I was wondering why someone sent me a picture of a mushroom.

Man, what happened to the good old days when people would just sent text messages of dick pics to other people?

He's clarifying because he used to be Snoop Lion duh

This is gross. I like it.

Hysterically*

I just moved to Chicago so I'm looking forward to seeing another team that doesn't make me feel AS bad about the Detroit Lions (but still pretty bad).

you missed the "-ly funny" between "serious" and "health problem" JUST KIDDING

Hey! Mine wasn't the obvious one! :'(

Where should I begin?

COUNT THAT MARIJUANA POSSESSION AND A DUI!

How do you live with yourself

It's been a long day.

If only there was a slight modification to Mr. Blount's name you could make to create a relevant pun to the situation...such as LeGarrette Potsmokingthugnobama