Woodson: [pops champagne] [pours a glass] [takes a huge gulp] [spits it out] THIS IS ROOM TEMP!

This thing is broken. I selected a Pumpkin Ale and it didn't even suggest that I try cutting out my tongue and flushing it down the toilet.

Seriously. What an amazing young girl.

She is badass.

PRIEST MODE

If he isn't drafted, chalk it up to the NFL's non-prophet status.

NOW BACK TO THE FOOTBAW

Anyone else weirded out that a) there are 20-somethings asking Drew for advice and b) I feel the need to hand out my own? FROM MY VAST EXPERIENCE ON THIS PLANET BLAH BLAH.

"Hey man, can you pull up those crab traps?"

Huh, you'd think West Virginia would love the mother they share.

By the third time I'd think you would have learned that you have got to adjust your questions for Kentuckians.

This is the saddest list I've ever seen, including Schindler's.

+3 bowls (and not feeling full)

and i thought most arizonians were vehemently anti-beaner.

lol. I can't remember back to elementary—thanks mostly to lots of psychological help and heavy drinking—but in high school it was mostly "Virgin".

The student may be right. Based on the write-up of the insult, the teacher's clearly not a fan of capitalism.

I am just shocked how dumb Incognito, Pouncey, and Turner are for putting all of their shit i text messages. What a bunch of dipshits.

You just spent the time to type out a long series of sentences that essentially boil down to — Martin was too much of a pussy to stand up for himself and got what he deserved because if her were a manly-man like me he would have punched that guy in the face.

i get paid $38 a day to ride on my sybian