Except we’re also talking about breaking into cars to steal things, not just stealing the whole car. But not having an automatic transmission WILL make your car a less likely target of grand theft auto.

When I suspected that there was a possibility that I’d brought bed bugs home from a hotel in another state, I met my parents at an airport, changed into some throwaway clothes in the airport bathroom, put all of my suitcases into heavy duty black plastic garbage bags, and then left those bags in my car. Thankfully it…

Anyone catch the kid flip the double bird on the Malaga atletico Madrid broadcast ?

That bro is like, "My dad paid $50,000 for this?!"

I haven't had that one, but I definitely pick up the tart edge in Purple Haze that Gordon mentioned. Then again, I didn't realize that it's a raspberry beer, so I'm going to have to pick up another 6-pack and drink it with that knowledge.

Yeah, people shit on Abita all the time, but I've never ordered one of these and regretted it. I think of it as more of a grapefruit beer than a raspberry beer, reality be damned.

Jeez, what a Chris Thompson this guy is.

Or maybe this just means that Roger Ailes doesn’t want Rand Paul to be president?

Ooo, the philatelists are going to be… well, you know… over this one.

Rodney Alcala.

Is Drew’s post-reality show trajectory going to be more Miranda Lambert or more Rodney Alcala?

After I threw my sutured banana peel in the communal dorm trash can, a roommate saw it and freaked out because it was apparently the second mutilated banana peel that had shown up in the trash that week. Repercussions, people.

Justise Winslow. Pronounced “Just Eyes Wine Slav.” You’re welcome, Kev.

I don’t think it’s at all clear that the two statements were made by the same person. It sounds more to me like one of the players said the first line and Calipari said the “Oh my god” when he heard what his player had just said through the PA.

For PJ Tucker, it stands for “Pop Junior,” so PJ Williams’s father could be named Kenneth too.

One of the sandwich varieties my mom served me growing up was peanut butter, cheese, and mayonnaise.

The writing was on the wall when you went from being a fun guy to being a fungi.

The witness’s description of the contact as a “pet” is more accurate than the headline. Ass-slapping connotes Wojo slapping the maple like he’s trying to get syrup out of it.

It looks like you have the video cued to begin right after the important events, but maybe that’s just on my computer. Anybody?

Main takeaway: Shavlik Randolph is still in the NBA?!