Yeah, I'm sorry. I know the long, discursive style can be off-putting to people. That's why we always post a no-frills, meat-and-potatoes, short-form version of the recipe over on my personal Kinja. Here's this week's one:

Oh lawdy, if she was mad about Naughty Dog "stealing" her likeness...

Pink fish is back! Long live the pink fish!

PETA isn't angry with Pokemon.

Isn't PETA responsible for the killings of thousands of dogs and cats at shelters?

So much Kotaku to digest! Can't. handle. the. awesome. #kotaku http://bit.ly/24cs3r

All the way back to GTA III!?

That "R" actually made me think of Team Rocket at first.

Yea! 48 pages no ads is pretty crazy!

Stop making ponies of my daughter!

Haha, how naive. Attractive characters aren't a requirement at all.

Am I the only guy who wants practically dressed female characters? I shouldn't feel like a minority on this but I do.

Or...how about sexualising neither?

What they hell were they going to do with iPads that they couldn't do better with a freaking Thinkpad?

Starcraft's Tagline: Heavily Influenced by Command & Conquer.

Sorry you had a bad time.

So, you made a bad call, and so the whole system is worthless..... riiiight.

Meh. This did it better:

Nah, the offbrand iPhones or iPads never interested me.

When the in house testing on IOS 7 revealed that some users were experiencing dizziness and nausea, Apple wrote it off as their employees doing all of their testing while drunk at a bar.