same in Vegas, the bigger cab companies all have repetitive phone numbers. Except the repeated 4's. Too many Asian gamblers and 4 is the death number. Would you get into a cab whose number was 313-1313? Yeah no. Dude you took a ride in the Death Cab.

ironically enough, they're also both Dicks

as a now former resident of Virginia whose apartment building had framed lithographs of Lee and Stonewall Jackson in the goddamned foyer — yep.

yep, they didn't expect it to pass; this was their wink to their voter base that "oh we're TOTES with you on this, but the big bad liberal gay juggernaut won't let us enact it, shrug whattya gonna do?"

I had cousins who would pull that pranking shit when they were over during the holidays every year. Until the last time when they did that and my dad came out at them with a baseball bat. My aunt and uncle were furious but, because they were from a different part of the country they hadn't heard about the girl in the…

much like military ordnance, things that can be thrown at you in order to do you damage

to be fair to Drake, I'm sure if PSH were alive he'd want Drake to have the cover too. "Wait what, an obituary? Nah that's okay, Drake can have it, I'm good."

not only is her singing spot on but her other impressions are fantastic. She does a perfect Sarah Palin that almost makes you forget Tina Fey (hey I said almost)

give him a goddamned chess board and tell him to stuff it.

tl;dr "I haven't seen it/experienced it, therefore not only is it not happening, but you're all making it up/experiencing it incorrectly"

I dunno, Richard Burton never took second billing from anyone, including Liz. Not even as a kid. You might just have to try for twins.

middle name: Traffic Accidents. Oh wait that's two names. Well maybe you could hyphenate it: Cornjob Traffic-Accidents Nerd.

can I come over too, I have some Killer Shrew drink mix left from the last snowstorm...

Rocky: Again?

Iwould say a double feature of The Day The Earth Froze and Jack Frost would be timely and on subject. Also funny as hell (are you with the bride or the failure?)

so help me if I hear one "we hired the best person we could get regardless of gender but who totally happened to be a guy" I will slap someone into the next geological epoch.

also, unless you're Agatha Christie or a Bronte sister, you're an author, not an authoress. ETA: and even then, um, no.

oh come on, biathalon was featured prominently with figure skating in the best Roger Moore Bond movie, "For Your Eyes Only." It's the perfect villain winter sport. You just need to add "parachute jump" with it and it's a gold medal even England can win.

am I the only one who remembers the woman in Italy who had the judge tell her she wasn't raped because her pants were so tight they couldn't have been taken off without her own help/consent?

tl;dr don't exist, you're just asking for trouble.