“You know, we’d really love a [gender],” and then lean in a whisper “but I’ll just be happy if it’s white.”

This is kind of like saying “Use your car to drive on roads and go places.”

So, after rolling out a fourth model, Tesla’s vehicle portfolio is going to be....

If you were on the losing team, would you rather lose 13-0 to a better team that gave you their 100%, or would you rather still lose 7-1 to a better team that only gave you their 50%?

Potentially bigger question: Is it even important to identify a car as “luxury” anymore? In an era of rampant populism, isn’t it more advantageous to disguise luxury features into an otherwise humdrum package? 

How far away do you think the other seat is?

A third rear seat has never, ever, ever been a selling point for any car I’ve ever bought because I actually give a fuck about the people who want to ride in my car with me.

You’re missing the context. It didn’t say he was doing an excellent job full-stop. It said he was doing an excellent job replacing Kirk Cousins. It’s not a very high bar to clear. 

Another downside to exit rows on some planes is that the tray tables on the seat backs are disabled and instead are in the armrest. In these cases, the seat construction is also different and feels more like a bucket with a cut-out than any kind of quasi-comfortable chair.

After smashing the TV, he turned to his teammates and cried out “Give me your heart! Make it real, or just forget about it!”

“...a parody version that people can buy, own, and trick their friends into playing—is definitely one way to get the point across.”

Tricking your friends into participating in your self-righteous indignation when they were prepared for some juvenile giggles over drinks? What could possibly go wrong in that scenario?

Make you a deal: I’ll call back the pro-mayo troops if you get the anti-cilantro brigade to stand down.

“Within a day she was having a rueful laugh about it all and worrying about the work days she will miss.”

I always try to look around in an attempt to identify the one asshole who’s gonna try to make it fancy and harmonize the last note on the major third so that I can silently shut that shit down before it happens.

I can’t recall the last time Mike Love looked healthier.

It sounds like duckpin bowling, a variation of the sport regional to the mid-Atlantic states that is also dying a death no one cares about. 3 small balls instead of two large ones. The pins are still curvy but squatter and spaced apart farther. I once had the distinction as a boy of knocking down every pin in a…

The trouble, from where I sit, is that everyone wants everyone to do something while simultaneously agreeing to themselves, quietly, that Facebook status updates are enough “something” to do. The more frequently and the more intensely you succumb to that idea, the less you actually DO and the more you start to miss…

“The Duke game plan for basketball: “Don’t get tripped.” That’s right — don’t get tripped. If you have the ball, don’t get tripped; if you don’t have the ball, don’t get tripped; if you’re tripped, don’t get tripped — just don’t get tripped! That’s what Duke has in mind for you, Elon. That’s the Duke game plan. But I…

Not just jeans. Jeans and CROCS.

My love of watching these is inversely proportional to my desire to do it myself. It’s pure nightmare fuel, but fuck 100% of the tedium that goes with making it.