I think you are OK. If you find yourself masturbating to Super Mario Galaxy 2, it's probably time to step back and consider things a bit.

Hilarious. A+.

I actually thought it opened up on a FoD scene of a bear skull-fucking a corpse.

Hockey would be worth watching if refs could use Tasers. That would be outstanding.

Ah, nuts.

Is there a blurb about the articles not being clever or entertaining? Sorry if I missed those disclaimers. Maybe carefully hiding them is part of the whole "evil" thing as well...you clever bastards!

/taps finger on nose

You were an idol to me, man. A role model for me. Until this post.

You were an idol to me, man. A role model for me. Until this post.

My kids understand there are two things in their Halloween bags that dad addresses first:

Apparently we are on the same team, dude. Fighting evil as it occurs, with what intact teeth we have left.

100 GRAND. That's one hundred thousands reasons why this list is an offense in the eyes of God and man.

Nah it's all good, I just wanted to troll some fake Southies so I purposely read it negative. Though thinking about Cotton Mather is always depressing...I think he had nine kids and outlived like eight of them. Something like that. Those were really shitty times.

I did not realize all pilgrims came from Boston! In any case, it's a song reference, and the only good thing about the greatest band ever coming from Mass is that they despised the place.

As awesome as it is to see them come together and rebuild after a horrible disaster, it's fairly typical to see them come together and destroy after a wonderful success.

The good people of Minnesota will see your Chicago and raise you 4 lost Super Bowls and one "fuck you, Gary Anderson."

Well, I guess I'm the dipshit here. I thought it was referencing the odd and improbable chance that Boston would take the opportunity of a championship to act like complete fucking stereotypical Southie morons and indulge in some asshole rioting while making awkwardly honky gang signs at the cameras as they sneered…

My discarded Southern Baptist upbringing applauds you, sir. Nice.