You should immediately get sullen and mope around the office complaining to everyone how unfair it all is. When your boss comes around, burst into tears and run to the bathroom.

“and then whispered ‘obesity.’”

Here, honey, try on this pickle in your mouth...

I thought that too at first. But then I played against a few people who were really good and very tactical in how they methodically destroyed me and I realized that there’s more to it than just laying down cards. Those guys helped elevate my game a bit (although I still can’t beat them, dammit).

Blech. This fat cow is loving every minute of her new-found fame. Fuck this bitch.

Agree to disagree.

No. Any true “Cap’n” who grew up in the 80/90s would only ever eat Cap’n Crunch. We might choke down a bowl of Crunch Berries, but only if it was Saturday morning, Scooby Doo was on and mom wasn’t awake yet (in other words “we were desperate”). NEVER EVER Peanut Butter Crunch. That’s a rookie move.

I don’t think you know what you’re talking about, Limey.

Don’t punish the server because the kitchen can’t get their shit together, goddammit.

Snooki, you are one classy bitch. Call me.

This isn’t about acting, you guys. It’s about saving money on residuals.

The only way diamonds are ever a good deal is if you “know a guy”. The bloodier they are the better the deal, obviously.

The only diamonds worth anything are the real colored ones.

Don’t you mean “X-mas”?

We? No.

To be fair, there’s nothing remotely fun about Disneyland.

This is the precise kind of behavior that the fabled Turkish prison was invented for.

Tattoos are so boring and cliche nowadays. It’s not rebellious or “cool” to get them.

That’s not very respectful, young man.

This seems like a case of “filmmaking by committee”. In other words, some dweebs in suits who know nothing about the real story sitting around a conference room table using marketing buzzwords and saying shit like, “Don’t you think this whole ‘trans’ thing is played out? I mean I’m just so sick of Caitlyn Jenner and I…