The messiest, most chore-averse people I've ever met have been women. This article does not compute.

Poppycock. Everybody knows Monopoly was invented by the Hamburglar.

...which is why she was/is the most beautiful woman on earth. Ever.

Yesssssssssssssssssss.

I tip-toe when I'm not wearing socks or shoes. Ok. There! NOW YOU KNOW!!

You sound like a horrible person. Let's hang out.

You should never EVER discipline your kid when you're in a state of anger. Cool off and then approach the problem rationally and effectively.

I ate a Thin Mint the other day and it was not the same as the old Thin Mints. Even the shape was wrong. I'm done buying Girl Scout cookies.

Those bangs.....[shutter]

As the father of a 2 year old daughter, I really hope all the rest of Disneyland burns to the ground. That princess shit is seriously gross.

Aw!!! I'm not proud to admit that my newborn daughter can only be soothed by Katy Perry. ONLY KATY PERRY!!!!!

Is this what it takes for people to watch basketball?

Flying coach to France?! The INJUSTICE!

"Wish we could help him, but..."

It's not called la petite mort for nothing.

Shhhhhh....Dammit! Way to ruin the "October Surprise"!

That coffee tweet made me el oh el.

Yeah cause the guys who own Power Rangers don't give a fuck who it was intended for. You're missing the point.

Totally! Haha!

Fucking hell. So much outrage! When did everybody's skin get so thin?