Now Turkey Wants To Take Away Your Right To Check Out Cheerleaders

@Scarlett_Crimson:

If a 2 year old can do it, then so can I!

@MarkKelsosMigraine: "The way I evaluate history textbooks is first I see how they cover Christianity and Israel. Then I see how they treat Ronald Reagan—he needs to get credit for saving the world from communism and for the good economy over the last twenty years because he lowered taxes."

Gee, I really hope somebody makes a hilariously original joke about the word "Poll" being a homophone for a certain hard-drinking, soft-thinking nationality.

Court Rules Ladies' Nights To Be Acceptable, Of Course

@DoktorFunkenstein: The reason you plaster a catcher when you're "out by a mile" is to get him to drop the ball. The first time it was ridiculous because he went out of his way to hit him, but the 2nd time, that's the right play.

This is just like that movie Terminal, except something actually happened.

He was released from the hospital with a variety of bumps, bruises and cuts but nothing more.

@MarkKelsosMigraine: That has to be be the MKM-iest comment ever. I even have a sudden urge to watch Nathan Lane in a non-ironic sense.

That'll lower his bling rating in the next Madden update

This will feature prominently in season ticket sales pitches, since it's more fun than any actual baseball in Arizona.

@Kid Canada: Pete Gaines, is that you?

@Saberhagendaaz: "Hey look, it's just as boring, but in print!"

"Two years ago? Never heard of it."

their new "three-man toilet" routine

Meanwhile, the Late Winner For Deserved Maiming Of The Year Award has a $400 bill for Rick Pitino.

@bevraj of choice: Tell me about it. Probably the most consistently annoying aspect of commenting.

@Spartacoug: All of them, you see. That being the joke and all.