Your name tells me we would be friends.

So, about this Bruce Dern fanfic. Where might one go to find that?

I came in like a wiffle ball...

The producers of the Bachelor must realize they've gone as far as they can with the show, so they've decided to go out with a wang.

It does say Executive Women though. I'd imagine Wal-Mart is a pretty good company to work for if you're in senior management. If you're not, well yeah, fuck Wal-Mart.

Wage gap ballooned enormously under Reagan and Clinton. Politics are as irrelevant as sex, race, and religion. Wealth vs. Work is all that matters, and we don't value the latter anymore.

I'm guessing that this announcement will be having Scarlett Johansson rethinking her partnership with SodaStream. The Palestinian situation couldn't get her to foresake SodaStream, but Frankel is another level entirely.

• Joe Jonas' advice for all the former child stars of the world is to "watch the people around you and learn from their mistakes so you don't make the same." I am not a former child star, but this article referred to both Selena Gomez and Justin Bieber as "crooners," which is a mistake I have now observed and learned…

Ah okay, that does make sense.

I'm from Maine, like Mr. King and I think I can provide some further explanation. "Bitched" in Maine is sometimes used as a synonym for 'fucked', and he was trying to say that what happened to Dylan was fucked up. It was a poor choice of words, but his heart was in the right place.

I've started to see a bend about the tone of posters here that is really disturbing. It's a weird combination of having a divine insight into a person's intentions even if they are flat out telling you that you're misinterpreting their words, and not giving a shit who they step on to prove who's the most dedicated to…

So I planned on a witty reply to this along the lines of "still no equality since X number of men have been executed and only 5 women!" Haha! And then I went to the website of the death penalty information center to solve for X, and JESUS CHRIST. 505. In Texas, during my lifetime (99% of which I've lived in this…

Texas murders a prisoner, you mean.

It's alright, boo. Thinking of puppies dying makes me extra cranky, too. Hugs.

oh god

You know, I don't know. Re: the falling, I'd guess it's the former, because I think it has a lot to do with choosing the right size implants and placing them appropriately, but I'm sure there are also questions of aesthetics and trends involved (i.e. whether "the natural look" is in or desired by the particular woman…

That's an insult to slugs; they would probably be much better at hosting a talk show than this guy.

I had a similar a-ha moment in my early teens. My dad's wife at the time had just gotten implants and my dad, inappropriate as always, commented that "they fall to the side when she's lying down, just like they're supposed to." I'm not sure I would've picked up on that particular slice of normal for a long time if it…

The implants also moved to the side. Which I also didn't know - I thought it was just mine because they were implants. The cyst was fine - in fact, it was great because it was benign but I got insurance to cover 4 ultrasounds, so we were able to monitor my healing really well!

I had implants for a few years and then took them out b/c on an unrelated cyst. I went from flat to a AA - I had some mass for the first time in my life. I thought they were all wrong and felt lumpy and weird and didn't want to touch them. A good friend with pretty big ones said "what do you think tits feel like?…