OooOOOooh! I wish I got married at 15 to some backwater duck baron so that I could pluck feathers out of dead birds until I die or he can no longer see well enough to kill anything. Married life sounds divine!

That seems like a lot of resolutions. Why not put off "pushing out the baby" till 2015?

Yep, there were a few good times still to be had in the 90s.

It wasn't a NYE resolution, but I vowed to do #1 after I woke up with Ginuwine's Pony in my itunes and I didn't recall buying it.

I am going to START a "Ryan Gosling shirtless" news alert in the new year. Brilliant.

Because every sperm is sacred!

But his jacket smells like piss...

That's like the epitome of a faux-apology right there. Maybe it's the massive space nerd in me, who always wanted to be an astronaut and was really shaken up when the Columbia disaster happened when I was in high school - but this is just the grossest thing to me. "XO" isn't a song about "mortality" or whatever the…

Oooh, I'll play.

DONE. Just have to wait for ud to review it. Which honestly scares me. I feel like I'm going to get arrested for being super gross or something.

Pick = pluck! Got it.

Urban Dictionary defines* it as the removal of dingleberries.

*Not YET, but it should...

I wonder what it would take for me to actually be surprised by something this guy did.

I'm afraid I don't believe being cooler than a Tanner makes one legitimately cool. But either way: agree to disagree.

Which sandwhich is which?

Learn from Coco. Let the indifference flow through you.

I've got a shorter message to Martin Scorsese and Leonardo DiCaprio: Stop making movies together.

Yes Tim Curry was perfect! I googled the Dark Tower movie. I'm glad Ron Howard is involved and it that King is as well.

He really was. I also thought Gary Sinise made the perfect Stu. It was pretty well cast over all I thought, except for Nadine and Floyd.