It is going progressively worse, though. I mean, Black Crowes to Muse to Jonas Brothers. If she keeps this up, she will have to date Diplo next.

“He kind of freaked out and didn’t even say anything. And then Kylie Jenner pulled the finger at me and then security took them both out.”

This is the story of my life...it’s been 5 months of sleeping in makeup every night, and I have the Mount Rushmore-esque zits to prove it!

got really scared for a second because I thought you got it on your eyeball and then I thought oh god, that’s going to happen to me one day.

I’m new to lipsticks and after much debate, this weekend I picked up Stark Naked from Urban Decay’s new matte line, which is a warm nude and looks awesome on beauty bloggers. At 22 bucks, it was a splurge to this n00b. Whelp, my skin tone is a warm, yellowy nude as well, so if flu-ish zombie was the look I wanted,…

Didn’t wear sunscreen this weekend during my trip to Japan, and I have a U-shaped tan on my chest thanks to the shirt I was wearing. My dress for Vegas this weekend has a V-neck. Moron.

I picked at a pimple. you would think I would know better by now, but nope.

I tried a smokey eye. I have small eyes. Smokey small eyes are not a great look, it turns out. I don’t have enough eyelid real estate to warrant shadows of that level.

I used a makeup wipe to clean my face before bed. Woke up with still a smudge of liner and mascara, and thought it could get me through today. I thought wrong.

Last week I decided to try my Boscia Exfoliating Peel Gel, which I’d gotten on recommendation from my Sephora friends. I rub it all over my face, the skin is peeling right off and I’m pretty happy about it, until I rinse my face off and my jawline is covered with little white pills. The sloughed-off skin was stuck to…

I didn’t wash my hair last night. It was right on the edge of wash vs. it can go another day. I made the decision not to wash and I’m regretting it. Sigh, it took me years to train my hair to the point that it didn’t need to be washed every day. Sometimes, I try to take it too far. Today, is one of those days.

I wore a skirt that was too short. The wind did the rest.

I spent most of Saturday outside, got a real bad farmers tan burn. I am pasty white so I look like even more of a hillbilly.

I failed calculus twice, no big loss in my life that I still don't understand it. I am however constantly shocked at how many people can't do simple shopping math. How do those people survive?

Nothing says “International Women’s Day” than unaffordable and impractical clothing.

The Reuben one reminded me of a story Terry Pratchett told. He said that one jet-lagged evening he accidently asked for Three Mile Island dressing for his salad. The waitress didn’t say a word, just brought him Thousand Island dressing and a bottle of hot sauce.

I feel like rescinding an honorary degree is the ultimate slap in the face. Like, this fake ass made up degree is too good for you. YOU HAVE BESMIRCHED THE HONOR OF THE DEGREE.

I hate the man bun, but find baldness terribly sexy. So, maybe it will work out for the best in the long run.

There’s no such thing as rape babies anyway - the uterus just shuts that whole thing down.