I just chomp on that shit and swallow the seed and shell all at once.

If you listen closely, you could hear Drew Magary smash furniture from miles away.

Cut Joyce a break. This is, like, his first mistake out there.

“Oh yeah, Aleppo. That is the guy that Jesus cured, right?”

But `94 was better with one-timers and controllable goalies, with the caveat that blood-from-the-head and shaking on the ice after hits were gone.

When I want to learn about oppression, I consult the most attractive blonde girl I can find.

The Blaze is the “media network” that Glenn Beck started when Fox shitcanned him. Essentially this woman works for Glenn Beck.

“How dare you sit there and blame white people for the problems of the minority communities. After all, aren’t you half white? Didn’t two white parents adopt you, after yours weren’t willing to raise you?!”

Marine here again. I can’t stand how conflated “the flag” has become with “the military.” I also can’t stand the knee-jerk “patriots” whose default position toward the military is genuflection, and anyone who fails to bend the knee is shunned. These are not the hallmarks of a free society.

Can’t

The first such experiment, which was not the whole plane, was a disaster.

Why isn’t the whole plane made out of black on black crime???

“lol damn u autocorrect”

I wouldn’t say they are football illiterate. They’ve learned a lot in the three years they have rooted for the Seahawks.

Fitzpatrick says he is still trying to understand why, in this particular equation, 1+1+1+1=n<1.

read as....

“I won an Emmy for playing a woman dying of leukemia on L.A. Law, starring Harry Hamlin and Susan Dey.”

I have small quibbles with these rankings, but they are basically correct. The main error most Pop Tart eaters make is not recognizing that, generally, non-frosted Pop Tarts are far superior to frosted Pop Tarts. All frosted Pop Tarts taste like basically the same thing—pure sugar—which is an okay thing, but something…

Ashley will be jettisoned into space, in accordance with bankruptcy law.

Wait, are you telling us not to stick to sports????