Yes it is and yes I am!

hahahahah. Thats so perfect. I’m currently drinking wine alone in my room with the door locked so no one comes in and demands that I share with them.

B0th! But name tags for damn sure.

My sister is a 1st grade teacher for KCPS, she was elated when she was able to go to Chicago last summer for a Union conference... cuz she got to spend her weekend stuffing ‘back snacks’ or whatever they’re called. She said that whenever she got bent out of shape thinking about how little the district and the city…

I have decided that I want to be you when I grow up!

WOW. That’s hilarious, and I’m sorry I find it so. I bet you never lived that one done X[

OMG! I’m dying.

That must have been one hell of a eulogy.

Winner, winner chicken dinner!

SHUT IT DOWN! The internet is now closed for the evening!

I’m scream-laughing. Or laugh-screaming. I don’t even know how to describe the noises that are coming out of me right now.

Winner winner chicken dinner.

I’m laughing so hard at this and I’m at the train station and people are walking by giving the crazy woman sitting on a bench alone laughing out loud to herself the side eye and my freshly applied eye makeup is streaking but it doesn’t matter because this is amazing. Ah-Mazing. You're my new hero.

You win.

Oh my god. Was this like in Russia or Italy or something? Was he related to Silvio Berlusconi? Was part of the eulogy you telling your coworkers and boss that they could just throw away whatever was on your desk because you were never, ever coming back to the office again?

I laughed so hard reading this I choked on the sandwich I was eating. I did not die, but when I do, please deliver my eulogy. As my sex worker. Thank you.

You have to be shitting me. No way.

How did you do this? How did you clear your names? This seems like a vital life skill.

Take all my stars. All of them. Forever. Every star I star somewhere else will really be a star for this.

THIS IS AMAZING.