The monthly subscription is a nice “reminder” to do it. As I said elsewhere, the mediocre massage I get is infinitely better than the world class massage I don’t.

Fail as old as time.

Not since I’ve been old enough to actually have a chance to see one.

This.

This entire sequence has been less an unveiling of hidden misconduct and more an unveiling of the extent to which people closed their eyes to the misconduct.

I am a man and have had a Massage Envy membership for about two years. The automatic nature of the monthly massage works for me; I figure that the mediocre massage I actually get is better than the good massage I never do.

I was 15 when the Challenger blew up, and that day was my first experience with a “I can remember exactly where I was when I heard the news” moment. I was standing in line for lunch, and my English teacher told us. The pilot, Michael Smith, was the brother of one of the school administrators, and he had flown to…

It’s the early roll-out of a new partnership between the NCAA and US Navy jet pilots.

Even if you accept the (obviously, stupidly, grandly wrong) conservative interpretation of the Second Amendment, there’s still no actual right to sellguns. So why not ban that?

This would make for an awesome school Science Project. Do the math with different variables, find the best options, do it live on video in a pool. I’ll have to start making my boys watch Titanic so they’ll be primed when they get old enough for those dreaded things. Good grade and do it with a girl - can’t get any…

“I know one person who did the pre-poop pee. We told him at the time that it made no sense and he just said ‘I can’t do it any other way, man.’”

Or future junior Senator from Massachusetts.

That’s a pretty (kle)bold call there, buddy.

Is the doctor standing in the middle of the shot there to conduct hymen tests on every female spectator before and after the games? Is that the price of admission?

Better be quiet or someone will hear you. Voices carry.

Ah, I remember my first Dartmouth-Harvard game as a Pea Green freshman in 1989. Well, no, that’s not true. I don’t remember any of it. Rather, after driving down from Hanover, we met up with a friend’s parents, who were tailgating in the Harvard section where the dad had gone. We rolled up, found the parents, and…

That was actually in my first draft. Ultimately, however, I felt that was a bridgestone too far. I wanted to only use the pinnacle of puns, so I dunlop’d it out.

That was actually in my initial draft. Ultimately, however, I felt that it was a bridgestone too far. I wanted this to be the pinnacle of puns, so I dunlop’d it off.  

I bet this whole fiasco has been rough on her. In my view, there’s only one fairway to resolve this: let her keep the title.

There are good people on both sides, after all.