i minored in using people’s words against them.

I’ll have to go find my tiny violin.

The alternative fact of the matter is that he won 95% of the total votes and his approval rating is higher than an adorable kitty hiding in a box of packing peanuts

oh, but we didnt demoralize him, sean - he came to us, quite honestly, without any morals at all.

Life is just so hard when you’re a billionaire in charge of the most powerful country on earth. I’ll have to go find my tiny violin.

Aww, Donny, are you having a rough day? Do you need a nap before you have to put on your big boy pants and GOVERN THE FUCKING COUNTRY LIKE AN ADULT?

I’m looking forward to the next one:

Patriots, Day 2: Ring The Belichick.

“That wasn’t a false alarm. It was the alternate alarm.” KellyAnne Conway

Mark Wahlberg just posted his bail

NEEDS MORE REVS

The Patriots haven’t had a real QB to beat except for when Russel Wilson came to visit and beat them soundly.

Those will be worth more at Barrett-Jackson 2018!

Oh dear, what will the new Jalopnik currency be if we no longer have V6 Mustangs?!

Hijack: WHO’S HYPED FOR THE MONTE CARLO RALLY?!

Wait, someone at Ford thought that was an improvement?

I’ll take a Viper ACR over any Icon any day of the week. While I do lile some of the Icon vehicles I just feel like it would be better money spent doing the work myself. The Viper is just raw, sure it’s not gen 1 Viper raw, but in the crowd of cars it competes with currently it is as pure of a sports car as you can…

Yeah, the welds on that piece of shielding (not like they were welds on the intake manifold or anything) looked like garbage.

He ran into a laundry list of problems

If true, this is an impressive win for the Trump camp.