I guess they fucked it up?

Salt makes things taste good. You can pry my salt-shaker from my bloated, dead hands.

I feasted on bowl food for breakfast this morning. In fact I’ve been doing it since I was a child.

What kind of wine were they drinking in the olden times?

Stuff costs more than it used to. Young people use curse words.

Fast-and-Furious-Verse?

Bring back Rainforest Crunch!

Maybe he’s super into Pokemon Go.

Hanger is where planes are stored.

The word is hangry, and it’s been around since 1992:

Size matters not.

Size matters not.

Yeah, but as soon as you take the restraining bolt off, it runs off in search of it’s ‘true’ owner.

Yeah, but as soon as you take the restraining bolt off, it runs off in search of it’s ‘true’ owner.

It’s authentic because R2 was bought refurbished by Uncle Owen.

It’s authentic because R2 was bought refurbished by Uncle Owen.

Cats are just really into recycling.

How is artisanally sharpened pencils not a Portlandia sketch?

Counterpoint, if sizes were reversed, cats would eat you.

This is just not true. The bartender relies on tips to make a living, and isn’t going to want to risk those tips by upsetting customers.

Best show to teach cooking: Good Eats

Vulture Capitalism. Purchase struggling businesses by taking on lots of debt, scavenge for parts, dump the debt by declaring bankruptcy.

Dairy Queen is the only job I was ever fired from. Still not my worst fast food experience, though. That was Little Caesars.