Soaps, ranked:

+1 Nerfgun to the back of the head.

Snowden’s leaks did compromise some of our surveillance measures, but I think what he did is much more akin to Daniel Ellsberg leaking the Pentagon Papers. Snowden’s leak exposed a level of domestic spying that would probably not have been revealed otherwise. The other thing is that the NSA’s capabilities are so…

Your argument is like people who are frightened to fly so they drive instead because they "feel safer."

I agree, it’s bad rep stems a lot from the admittedly shitty weather that can screw up traffic. It also could be cleaner, but if you get stuck there, you have a million options for food and a lot of relatively close hotels.

I didn’t think it was possible, but Wrigley has finally seen a worse delivery than Edwin Jackson’s.

That is interesting, I hadn’t seen that. I also found this extra neighborhood analysis of the 2014 Facebook data:

I didn’t bring up attendance to discuss prowess, just in terms of discussing whether more Chicagoans root for the Sox or Cubs.

Okay, so if you do that and even assume that no one from out of town goes to the Cell, that puts Cubs and Sox even on attendance last year (withing 100,000 for the season). But the Cubs still had higher TV ratings than the Sox last year (1.5 to 1.15). They were both in the bottom five for TV ratings (as they should…

The Cubs outdrew the Sox by a million fans last year, and that was a year when the Cubs were overtly tanking as opposed to just tanking.

Kevin Kiley has a point. Women just aren’t tough enough to referee a football game. Sure, they can spend a dozen hours pushing seven pounds worth of human through something the size of a cigar tube, but can they handle a large man swearing at them during a childhood game that is a meaningless distraction from our…

Many balls from Cutler fall well short of their target.

He looks like he’s about to get handed a glass of sweet tea and a shitload of Chris Hansen.

Was that trophy designed by Geno Auriemma?

+1 slice of gay wedding pizza

Things got really awkward when Bo yanked his pants down to show the bite marks on his hip where Al Davis sucked out his life force so that he could live another 20 years.

Almost certainly a Bears fan who loves to get off the truck running.

“And so his head was crushed like a melon being smashed with the hammer of Thor
Red and pulpy and full of seeds of thought he will have no more.
...what, too soon?”

I will be adding this new skill to my LinkedIn profile, then hitting Taco Bell and working on collecting endorsements.

No surprise that Pete Carrol would disrupt a head shot from the back and to the left.